I guess the universe is not yet done scolding me. I could not blame it. This has been an exhausting issue. It should be a thing of the past all along. Yet, here I am caving in to whatever parallelisms in everything I read or watch or realise. Fuck.
Anyway, I am projecting again on what I have seen on TV. K-drama, of course! I am so jealous (a bit) of how such storylines are made. They are like ice creams and rainbows on a drizzling sunny day with just enough cool breeze. Lovely days. Enchanting.
Twenty Five Twenty One. Wow! Here is my summary ––
First love could last forever.
First love can wait.
First love, though passionate as it seems, it is just that thing of the past. It mostly does not follow through.
Friends since birth
No friends at all
Making friends, better late than never.
Anonymous Friendship
New found friends
I realise, I do not have a first love. I have returned or bounced back a feeling of someone. The horrible part is, I bounce with it. All those time I just want a person to stay by my side. Not necessarily a friend. More of a casual conversation partner. I remember my state of mind. It is all about something else and it is never petty like thinking about a boy. If I am being immature here, I say, it is all him. Yet, I am the one pining. Fuck, right?
I like the part wherein Hee-do and Yi-jin are just being each other's person by just simply being there. They both know they have a certain degree of affection, which is why they have a hard time labelling what they have as a relationship. And then, the moment Yi-jin tells Hee-do that he loves her. Boom! Fuck. Why does he have to ruin it?! Hee-do wants a label and even more than that eventually. So, they become lovers, and well... just like fuck was that and me.
I like what I have with fuck was that (I am calling him that now). Pure conversation. It is even telepathic. Seriously! There are barely words spoke. I like how he slightly turn from his seat just to just have a tiny glimpse of me occasionally. I always catch him. Bah! He is the first to hold my hand; the first to hug me; perhaps he would have been my first kiss. Thank goodness, he is not!
I do not know. I am hungry now. I have to stop rationalising of something from yonks ago. But hey, that TV series has brought back an on-going memory (on another medium).
I have to stop this crazy. Hahaha! But hey, it gets me writing. And writing, I love love love.
sC